Confusing Thoughts

More and more people are joing the blog community. I DO swear, though, that if Lucy gets a journal, I'm officially taking this one entirely down and never turning my computer on again. I wouldn't like ANY of this to fall in HER hands. She's annoying... very VERY annoying, in fact, unbearable. Well... anyways, I really don't mind having more journals to read, it's rather entertaining when you've got nothing to do at your job, and believe me, I like taking minutes off just to doze off.

Today, I took some time just to relax. There's this place in Fantasia, only I and Drafo know about, and I went there, just to be alone, just to relax and take some time away from everything else. To be completely honest, I felt so tired today. As if, I just wanted to sleep for a long time and wake up a thousand years later. However, I just day-dreamed. It was completely silent and I had various hours to think about how everything's going.

To some point, everyone... I think... is happy. Right? I haven't heard of any more messes lately, so that's what I guess. Anyways, I don't think it really matters. Everyone lives in their own world, thinking about their own wants and needs. People don't care about others, and that's specially applied to humans: they seldom realize the needs of others. That's probably the reason why they're so far behind.

Sometimes I feel like this... I think about my past and future, and I just want to take things slowly. Ouuns are near to being inmortal, but that's just a matter of speech, we'll all die too, I just want to make my existence worth it. I worry about my relationship with Ivan too, how much do I love him? How much does he love me? How much would we give for the other? Maybe I'm thinking too much about a relationship that's not even meant to be. Although I want to be with him, what makes us consider we can do it? I mean... CAN we?

Well, aside from that, I was thinking about a peculiar episode that happened long ago. When I visited Vega, I usually did it through a stop-watch Kaine had gifted me with. At first, he used it. But in the end, I went so much, he just decided I could keep it for some time. When everything happened, I gave that watch to Jura... my siren friend. She needed the blasted thing. I wonder what happened to that damn thing... after all.... it was one of the few things I still had that reminded me of him.