hehe. Being scared, letting go, returning... a lot of things about 'living' are tough. I would say... it's a matter of perspective. I've always said it and will continue with my policy until the day I pass on from this world: I have no regrets and I'm happy about it.
To die, to kill
To love, to hate
To be, to become
To remember, to forget
To show, to know
To deliver, to receive
To deny, to accept
Life is all about contradictions. We often find ourselves in one of the edges, rarely in the middle point, where all is balanced. That's why it's always good to have someone by your side: they might just be in the opposite edge and you might end complimenting each other. And if you HAVE encountered yourself in such a situation, I must congratulate you, for it is indeed peculiar to find oneself with a completing piece.
Today is Christian's birthday. I've never mentioned him before because I don't know him, at least not personally. Caterina is the one who mentions him always, so I'll acknowledge his birthday in this blog. There. Birthday acknowledged.
Now.
As I was saying... It is very hard to find someone who will just be there when you need a helping hand. I'm not a trusting person, so I consider very few people 'friends'. Please... in the end, and with all due honesty, all you have is yourself. However... my point of view has changed slightly: I know think friends are necessary. Because I have them NOW, I realize just how much I lacked them before. True. Drafo and I have been together ever since we were born, but he's not even my friend, he's more like my brother, an extension of me, and not even he could save me from those days of darkness (but I've explained just who can save you under those circumstances).
A world without friendship SUCKS. Yes, no need in refining it, or trying to build a philosophical conception around it: NO FRIENDS... SUCKS... and BIGTIME. It's taken me some time, but I've slowly opened up to people. Now, more than ever, that I've endured those hard moments that make you stronger. It doesn't matter if sometimes they hurt you, part of being within a group is, sadly, getting hurt, and hey... you'll bound up hurting someone to. Stick up for them. I couldn't imagine myself without a great many of the friends I have now. They... make me happy.
Friendship is necessary, if not essential. But then again, maybe I'm getting soft with the years. I know I wouldn't have thought this way 50 years ago, but it's part of growing up too.
So... this blog is for my friends... they know who they are, they know what they've done, but these words are for you:
Thank you. Not only because you were there, but because you weren't afraid to be there. Thanks for pushing me forward, even if it was mighty tempting to stay put. Thank you for showing me the meaning of pain, value, strength, courage, will, cruelty, love... Thanks for staying by me. I am who I am, because of me, true, but I am better because I've learned from you. I feel happy because I'm no longer facing challenges alone. So thanks... for sharing, for giving me part of yourself...
AND if you ever COMMENT any of the things I've said, I'll kill you: I'll hunt you down, shred you into little pieces and burn you. You'll have to sleep with the windows shot, and even that way, I'll find you, I'll appear through your shadows and make you suffer.
So... ^^ just read this, appreciate the feelings I have for each and every one of you, take it in, and trust me, it's true... JUST DON'T SAY IT OUT LOUD. Thank you
To die, to kill
To love, to hate
To be, to become
To remember, to forget
To show, to know
To deliver, to receive
To deny, to accept
Life is all about contradictions. We often find ourselves in one of the edges, rarely in the middle point, where all is balanced. That's why it's always good to have someone by your side: they might just be in the opposite edge and you might end complimenting each other. And if you HAVE encountered yourself in such a situation, I must congratulate you, for it is indeed peculiar to find oneself with a completing piece.
Today is Christian's birthday. I've never mentioned him before because I don't know him, at least not personally. Caterina is the one who mentions him always, so I'll acknowledge his birthday in this blog. There. Birthday acknowledged.
Now.
As I was saying... It is very hard to find someone who will just be there when you need a helping hand. I'm not a trusting person, so I consider very few people 'friends'. Please... in the end, and with all due honesty, all you have is yourself. However... my point of view has changed slightly: I know think friends are necessary. Because I have them NOW, I realize just how much I lacked them before. True. Drafo and I have been together ever since we were born, but he's not even my friend, he's more like my brother, an extension of me, and not even he could save me from those days of darkness (but I've explained just who can save you under those circumstances).
A world without friendship SUCKS. Yes, no need in refining it, or trying to build a philosophical conception around it: NO FRIENDS... SUCKS... and BIGTIME. It's taken me some time, but I've slowly opened up to people. Now, more than ever, that I've endured those hard moments that make you stronger. It doesn't matter if sometimes they hurt you, part of being within a group is, sadly, getting hurt, and hey... you'll bound up hurting someone to. Stick up for them. I couldn't imagine myself without a great many of the friends I have now. They... make me happy.
Friendship is necessary, if not essential. But then again, maybe I'm getting soft with the years. I know I wouldn't have thought this way 50 years ago, but it's part of growing up too.
So... this blog is for my friends... they know who they are, they know what they've done, but these words are for you:
Thank you. Not only because you were there, but because you weren't afraid to be there. Thanks for pushing me forward, even if it was mighty tempting to stay put. Thank you for showing me the meaning of pain, value, strength, courage, will, cruelty, love... Thanks for staying by me. I am who I am, because of me, true, but I am better because I've learned from you. I feel happy because I'm no longer facing challenges alone. So thanks... for sharing, for giving me part of yourself...
AND if you ever COMMENT any of the things I've said, I'll kill you: I'll hunt you down, shred you into little pieces and burn you. You'll have to sleep with the windows shot, and even that way, I'll find you, I'll appear through your shadows and make you suffer.
So... ^^ just read this, appreciate the feelings I have for each and every one of you, take it in, and trust me, it's true... JUST DON'T SAY IT OUT LOUD. Thank you
3 comentarios:
I never comment... I have too many clients to care, but that was beautiful Ashley, specially the part where you burn people down. I can't help but admire how you must *ALWAYS* add that personal touch of yours.
Thank you for acknowledging Christian's birthday ^_^ It means a lot. I don't know if I am or have ever been considered your friend hon, but I do want to thank YOU because you've been very supportive of my break-up (even if you haven't even noticed) and honestly I count you as one of mine. So I hope you can count on me as a friend as well alright?
I know you H-A-T-E it, but if you ever feel sad/lonely/angry/miserable/bitchy/moody/just-plain-ol-blah don't hesitate to gimme a call. We'll drink ourselves silly and bitch about our lives together and then laugh at how amazing they really are. (I'm sure there must be a special demon drink just for you XD)
Kisses hon,
Cat
Thank you for acknowledging my birthday. That was very kind :)
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